DAICON IV: SPECIAL EDITION

Tue, 03/28/2006 — Brooke

Alright. We all know very well that this is a videogame specific website and in no way plan on turning the old battleship into Ecchi-Attack 2: Electric Boogaloo, as fun as that might be. However, the matter at hand is so vitally important to every reader – nay, to mankind itself – I would be grossly mistreating each and every one of you if I didn’t let you know of this vitally urgent mission straight off the bat.

NINJA EDIT: DOWNLOAD DAICON NOW. YOU HAVE NO MORE EXCUSES.

First of all, if by some miracle you haven’t seen the Daicon IV short already, go. Go and locate it now; I don’t care if you have to murder a busload of kitten-carrying kindergarteners to get your greasy hands on this thing, just do it. You will look up with blood and tears streaking your face, smile widely, and thank me, I promise. Created for the 22nd Japan SF Convention by a bunch of ragtag art students (you’ll know them better as Gainax), this 4:23 long piece of animation is possibly the best thing ever created by mankind’s soiled, sticky hands. It is if God Almighty Himself reached down from the heavens, donned a pair of bunny-ears and a battletail, and said ‘It is Good’. To wit:


Yes, that is Darth Vader.

The little girl from the original Daicon animation is all growed up, and how. Darth Vader is fought to a standstill, an Alien gets its acidic ass kicked, and pretty much every other comic book /sci-fi character in existence is scrolled over, fought, or otherwise referenced in some fashion or another. Then the world blows up in a shower of cherry blossoms and eye-numbingly gorgeous animation. Then Daicon Girl reconstructs it.

Did I mention all of this is done to Electric Light Orchestra’s Twilight? Did I also mention she’s a bunny-girl? That is really all you need to know.


BEHOLD YOUR NEW GOD

There is one small problem with viewing this fine little chunk of animated history, and that is in most cases the quality is horrible. It looks like it’s been ripped off a 1983 betamax, which is pretty much exactly what has happened. It has all the clearness and crispness of a VHS tape your mom copied Saturday morning cartoons onto 19 years ago. There is a laser disc edition, oh yes there is, but it is very very rare and sells for $1,000 and upwards, if you’re lucky enough to actually find a copy.


You will never, ever touch this as long as you live.

So how do we fix it so everyone regardless of race, creed, colour or gender gets to see Our Lady Of The Ears? Two possible ways. Either someone so very kindly rips their laser-disc edition and uploads it to … wherever, or … well …

Gainax remasters Daicon IV.

Spread the word, preach to the choir, tell every single person that you know. Remastered Daicon IV: Together you and I can make it happen.


In the name of the Bunnyears, the Battletail ...

Amen.

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