GREAT MOMENTS IN GAMING ANACHRONISM: Bloodrayne

Thu, 09/09/2004 — Fasteriskhead

INT. SMALL APARTMENT - EARLY EVENING

We're inside a messy APARTMENT shared by two 20-something males. CHRIS, the enthusiastic ARTIST TYPE wearing t-shirt and jeans, is already here, sitting at a cheap-looking TABLE working on a SKETCH of a SEXY BABE IN BLACK LEATHER. After a moment JEFF, professional PROGRAMMER in business casual, enters.
Chris
Sup, dude! How was your day?
Jeff, exhausted and frustrated, COLLAPSES on the COUCH.

Jeff
Terrible. The suits have me working on this shitty third-person game that's going nowhere. Something about fighting the Nazis while travelling around the globe protecting supernatural relics. I mean the rip-off could not be more obvious even if they called the thing fucking "Stienenwolf."
Chris is BARELY PAYING ATTENTION, still captivated by his SKETCH.
Chris
Sucks, man.
Jeff
Eh, I shouldn't complain so much, at least the pay's not bad. Speaking of work though, any luck finding a job?
Chris
Nah, I searched the want-ads this morning and there's nothing too promising... no one really wants artists at the moment, I guess.
Jeff
Bummer.
Suddenly Chris gets excited, as he now gets to SHOW OFF.
Chris
But I did get some work done! I've been tossing an idea around and I did a few sketches of this hot redheaded vampire chick in tight leather with swords on her arms, she's pretty awesome. And she's not just savage and sexy, she's also sassy!
Jeff takes a cursory glance but is DUBIOUS.
Jeff
Uh I'm not sure how useful stuff like that's gonna be money-wise, man. I mean, can't you do some applications or something?
Chris
I've already applied to like half the businesses in the county dude, at this point it's either draw hot girls or watch Yu-Gi-Oh reruns.
Jeff
Yeah, I know, I'm sorry.
Jeff PICKS UP one of the sketches and gives it a closer look.
Jeff
I like the harpoon, it's a nice touch.
Chris
Thanks, you see she spears victims and then sucks their blood. I uh, I don't have a name yet, probably something blood-related. Natasha Blood, maybe... naaah, that sounds too Russian. Bloodia maybe, oh jesus that sounds fucking horrible. Anyways I was thinking of shopping her around to some comic book companies, I mean what young man doesn't enjoy watching girls in tight clothing kill stuff? It's "all the rage" or whatever.
Suddenly Jeff reaches ENLIGHTENMENT.
Jeff
Yes... yes, it is, isn't it?
Chris
Uh, dude?
Jeff
Do you think I could borrow these sketches and bring them in to work tomorrow?
Chris
What do you mean?
Jeff
I mean we might be able to use, uh, Bloodia here in the game. Fighting Nazis and stuff.
Chris
Dude, I don't think they even had black leather back in the '40s.
Jeff
Oh fuck off.

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