Wasting Away At The 100 Rads Bar: Part 1

Thu, 01/21/2010 — Rev. Ragu


...And there goes another one. Why can't I stop doing this? I'm not even guarding anything here. It's a warehouse full of empty crates and a couple of pipes going nowhere, and here I am, pacing back and forth on this catwalk, trying to look like I'm actually supposed to be here, telling everyone to GET OUT OF HERE. I keep pushing everyone away, and though I want to stop, I don't feel I have any control over it!

I was in the bar one day, stuffing diet sausage in my mouth, downing whole bottles of vodka, miserable, not really having any idea why I'm out here in this irradiated hellhole full of incomprehensible death at every turn, telling everyone who tries to reach out to GET OUT OF HERE, STALKER. So one day, in a fuzz of self-hatred and last night's bender, I told myself that things had to change. I would make an effort to open up and learn to trust people again.

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Mon, 07/26/2004 — Sak

Sometimes I wonder
if Campbell is actually
listening to me.

On Hope

Sat, 07/24/2004 — Fasteriskhead

As I sit there in the dark at 4:00 a.m. staring at my moniter, a voice in the back of my mind proposes, "Hey!! Maybe if I can get my Ice Blaster here up to level 30, then my life can change for the better!" It grows more and more convincing with each passing moment. "The fact that I've flunked out of college and my entire family hates me and my parents refuse to give me any kind of recognition or aid won't matter! While women may look at me with a mixture of disgust and pity and right now I seem to be destined to a life of bitter loneliness without a hint of love or intimacy, all that is soon to change! Today I may be stuck in a shitty, go-nowhere job delivering stale inedible pizza, and when I return home I may look with a certain grim joy at the knife I've placed on the edge of the bathtub (in preperation for when I will finally escape this hell that is life), but NO MORE!" Yes, for with only a few missions further, Admiral Algor will reach the big three-oh; at last I will be the king of single-combat damage, and finally I can know of that elusive "joie de vivre." Women will flock to me and I will reach the fame and fortune of which I have always dreamed.

Time passes. Of course, when Admiral Algor does eventually turn over, none of it happens.

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