Questionable Design Directions

Mon, 09/06/2004 — Fasteriskhead

This transcript is an excerpt from a three-hour recording sent to the Andore Jr. offices by a source who wishes to remain anonymous. It depicts a short chat between two programmers, and though the tape cannot be precisely dated we can determine from internal evidence (chiefly an extended discourse on how rad Van Helsing looks and what sounds like someone playing the Ninja Gaiden demo) that the conversation in question took place sometime in early 2004.

(01:49:23, excerpt begins. humming of flourescent lights; music, poss. electroclash; coughing, prob. from Voice 2)

Voice 1: Okay so uhh, this is looking pretty good. We've just taken the player and run him through Hell itself, in the process offering the most extraordinary graphical experience ever witnessed in a video game. That's pretty good, I mean I think we've done something that's pretty cool with this.
Voice 2: I think people will be very impressed with the Hell stuff.
1: Yeah. But now like, the game's still not done and we have to find some way to top that, and I'm not sure how. Like, it's hard to do. I mean when you've got rivers of lava and hellfire and the souls of the damned flying every which way it's hard to get more awe-inspiring and technically impressive than that.
2: And the dragon.
1: The dragon too, yeah.
2: Well, can we make the player go deeper into Hell? Like he was only screwing around in circle one and there are nine, I mean eight more after that?
1: Dude, I don't know how much more lava and souls and etc. the animators want to mess with.
2: Well, can't we just... can't we add a couple more hours of crawling through a darkened military base fixing equipment by pushing buttons on consoles? And plus I think Kev and the rest are almost finished with the new Cyberdemon model so uh we should probably throw that in at the end also.
1: Yeah that uh, that sounds pretty okay. I mean that would be an okay ending I think.
2: Yeah. (beat) Hey uhh, can I ask you something? Like, hypothetically, if I... I mean, if a friend of mine just found out that he really really liked Peter Gabriel, would he... would that make him a total queer or what?
1: Dude look, I've had to buy So like three times because people keep stealing it when I loan it to them. I mean if it's wrong to like Peter Gabriel then fuck being right, you know?
2: Okay good... that's, that's good. I thought it was kind of weird that I'd be listening to Secret World or whatever and I'd start crying, I mean seriously tears dude.
1: Hmm.
2: Oh hey also, are you the asshole who keeps adding all those creepy winged baby motherfuckers all over the place?
1: Yeah, sorry about that, I... I just think it's kind of funny because they scare the hell out of the interns.

(01:57:53, excerpt ends)

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