Super Piety Bros.

Tue, 07/13/2004 — Sak

Amongst the biggest botherations for the believer in God to reconcile is the logical problem of evil. It goes a little something like this:

  1. God is omniscent, ubiquitous, morally perfect, and devoid of evil.
  2. The world is not morally perfect or devoid of evil.
  3. Therefore, the existence of God is improbable.

Throughout the canon of western thought, theologians and philosophers have tried their best to solve this problem, many a times without successful results. I think the biggest problem with this little inquiry is that it's entirely quixotic in nature - most of the time, the believer is going to believe, and the non-believer will choose not to. To the latter: this post is not for you. To the former, get ready for a life-altering experience that can only be brought to you by a cocky jerk in his 20's who thinks he already understands the very essence of aesity. Whether you believe in Allah, Zeus, or Ohrmazd, be prepared to get intimate with the Lord. W-wait, no -- no, I didn't mean it like that! C-come back!

Jesus. Well, at least you're still here, right? The nature of videogames tends to lend themself towards the secular, any sort of spiritual revelation you have during Mario Bros. is probably due to the effects of an illegal, mind-altering drug, and not the mystical deity-human relationship, right? Well, partner, throw out your psilocybin and hang on to your N64 controller (or at least attempt to, I know it's a bulky little sucker), because here's several moments in videogame history expressing the man-to-intangible-being relationship that every person should have with the deity of their choice!

Final Fight
The recognition of a higher being.
This mp3 describes the first step towards fostering a healthy relationship with that great big bearded fellow up in the sky (or gigantic wolf, or six armed woman, or absolutely adorable elephant - whatever you prefer). Bred was an ordinary fellow like any else, living day to day without searching for any real meaning in his life. He even fell in with the wrong crowd! Pickin' fights with the local mayor and kidnappin' his daughter - why - it was nothing short of a life of sin! Until one day, whilst paying for gas, his eyes were opened by the holy hand of that very mayor that he had launched a positively unholy crusade against. His exclamation is one, not of disappointment, but of piety. From that day forward, Bred dedicated his life no longer to kidnapping in the name of sin, but rather, kidnapping in the name of the Lord.

Final Fantasy Tactics
Standing with the absurd.
The quote to the left is a recognition of God's omniscence and maximal power. The ability to connect with God relies on the belief that his or her power is beyond mere mortal comprehension, and Orlandu, pictured here, is in recognition that any sort of logical foundation for the belief in a higher being is thoroughly misguided. Orlandu takes a Kierkegaardian stance here, a leap of faith, so to speak - and puts his trust in the dear sweet Lord from times of yore. This assertion seems rather absurd -- and it is! Orlandu's avowal towards the seemingly irrational is perhaps one of the most fruitful steps towards leading a life of religious sanctity.

Responsibility for one's own actions.
The character portrayed in Enix's Actraiser, featured to the left, clearly places his trust in God, but takes responsibility for his own actions. This particular scene draws immediate allusions to St. Augustine's classic dialogues with Evodius, wherein God places his foreknowledge in abeyance, in order to insure the greatest gift he can towards mankind - free will. I guess, in all fairness, I should point out that in Actraiser, you actually play as a god, and your ability to totally fuck with people isn't all that limited. Let that be a lesson to us all - gods have the ability to make us go batshit insane (see also: Dionysus).

There you have it folks! Three examples of the bond between homosapien and the all powerful, all loving, makes-the-world-go-'round supreme being. After all, where else are you going to get your spiritual know-how? Books? Yeah-fucking-right.


Thu, 06/25/2009 — Bred N. Butter

Just out of curiosity, how was "Jesus (Terrible Bio-Monster)?" My version stopped playing at the title screen...

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